You all smell like shit probably so read and watch these things that I probably stole from Reddit and laugh at them as if they were my own. Thank you and goodbye.

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14th July 2011

Text with 3 notes

I Nearly (Read: Completely) Forgot

I entered some stupid fucking contest that I don’t give a shit about just because the girls at my physical therapy said they would tell all their patients to vote for me if I entered. So enter I did. The competition is basically just a bunch of clearly obnoxious hot girls that can’t spell, and a couple art fags. I’m basically a shoe in to win,* and I uploaded a picture of me wearing sunglasses to a competition for spokespeople because I don’t give a shit. I specifically call everyone else out on being boring and generic, and then lie a lot while also assuring the reader that I’m not lying even though I so completely am. So help me troll all these losers and get the grand prize of a position as some lame car company’s spokesperson and a free car for six months. What a shitty prize. I would advise you not to waste time reading other peoples’ shit, as they are painfully, and I mean painfully, lamedick.

http://www.countylineauto.com/cl_talent_stars.htm

4/5 of the way down. I would be the one who purposefully entered his name as EmptyJump. Voting starts July 25. Work your magic, Tumblr.

*I am in no way, shape or form a shoe in to win. I may not even be near shoes. I live in a shoeless existence in which shoes are yet to be invented.

  1. lousyshots said: Wait… so I wasn’t supposed to vote for Drive-In Dave?
  2. flagonthemoon said: well your entry was a billion times more awesome than i expected. im still not voting for you though. drive-in dan has my vote.
  3. emptyjump posted this